The Finer Things Club is endorsing Obama.
On a recent outing to lunch in Tyson's Corner, I got stuck behind a car with the following bumper sticker...No, I would not even call it a bumper sticker. It was more of a homemade BANNER, printed on an Epson in someone's home office, possibly laminated, and prominently affixed to the trunk of the car in all of its glory. It read, "REPUBLICAN: BECAUSE NOT EVERYONE CAN BE ON WELFARE."
Now I was directly behind this vehicle, and immediately upon seeing this monstrosity, I started gnashing my teeth and came dangerously (deliciously) close to honking my horn and pumping my fist in the air, before proceeding to other, more obscene, gestures. The passenger in my car, a more conservative member of society than myself, physically restrained me.
I wonder what my politically dumb trunk banner would say if I had one? "DEMOCRAT: BECAUSE I CARE ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE." Or maybe my fuel-efficient Accord would look good in, "DEMOCRAT. AT LEAST I'M NOT IN FOREIGN OIL ADDICTS ANONYMOUS (FOAA)." Or the ever scathing, "DEMOCRATS: BECAUSE MY CANDIDATES CAN WRITE THEIR OWN BOOKS." Shit, I am not any good at this. But I do really like this article.
P.S. Remind me to remove this post after I have simmered down. I'd give it another week or two.
DEMOCRAT. BECAUSE LOOK WHERE STRATEGERY GOT US.
ReplyDeleteI would like to post somewhat of a long-winded rebuttal.
ReplyDelete1. In response to your first bumper sticker option:
A. I care about other people
B. You do not care enough about other people to share your guac when the restaurant fails to give your dinner companion his/her guac.
2. I would like to see the split of SUV-owning republicans v. democrats, and within those factions, those people that use them for their purpose, and those that just cruise around for pleasure. PS - I am also going to call you out on your lack of fuel-efficient honda.
3. Nobody writes his/her own books.
Expect a few of my own bumper stickers later in the day, but here's one for thought:
Republican: Because historically I give more charitable contributions than Democrats so that the country can support those on welfare.
OK, Anonymous. I mean, Dana.
ReplyDeleteDEMOCRAT: BECAUSE I DON'T USE CHARITABLE CONTRIBUTIONS AS A WAY TO REPENT FOR ALL MY OTHER SINS.
touche.
ReplyDelete- dana